The Living Part of La Vida Loca

It is sixty and sunny today in Santander. It is also the day before my first test, and the day that I have to make a half hour power point on tourism in Seville, in Spanish.

Of course, in true procrastination fashion, I left my laptop and gave up my Youtube search for a flamenco video that didn't contain creepy old men, and went on a run. Over the past few months, I have spent so much time sitting around stressing out about any of the following: money, homework, grades, classes back in the US that I'm not taking, failing at life when I get back, failing at life here, not being fluent in Spanish, getting fat on Spanish food, boys, not having the right wardrobe, not being able to think of blog things to write about, not being able to find things, and worst but not least, not taking advantage of where I live. It seems silly, if you think about it, to be stressed out about being stressed out. But you'd be by surprised the number of times I find myself stressed about my stress. And about being too tired to go salsa dancing or too tempted to say no to flan.

Today on my run (okay so more like walk walk walk jog walk walk walk jog) I was thinking about the whole concept of moments that take your breath away. For example, the jog, jog part of that walking combo. Or, for me, every time that the sun comes out and I get to look at the ocean and have one of those "Is this real life" moments. I've had a lot of those, this year. Some really awesome, some heartbreaking, and some where I absolutely have no words to explain it. Like the first time I dreamed in Spanish (and the only time, whatever) and forgot who I was, where I was, what I was, etc. Or when the sun was red one morning when I walked to school but the clouds were all purple. There are just some of those moments that you feel like you exist in this weird floaty universe of non-existence. Since that makes sense, and everything.

Basically the point of this rant is that I think we get so caught up in what we should be doing, what we have to do on our to-do list, and what everyone else is doing that we aren't, that we forget why we are alive. We forget to take an hour or two a day to enjoy life. Maybe that extra two points on a test won't be worth it in the long run, or short run, cause maybe you'll get hit by a bus on your way to the test. And if you did, wouldn't you rather have spent a little bit of each day doing something you love? Living the part of la vida loca that we get so caught up in?